Sleepaway™
Are you fed up with fad diets that don’t make you lose all your excess weight quickly, without effort or persistence? I know I was.
Hi, my name is Dr. Paul Merva, and I am the creator of Sleepaway™, the world’s first 100% effective weight-loss treatment that involves absolutely no work. That’s right, you heard me, with Sleepaway™ you’ll shed the pounds while you sleep!
First, clinically licensed anesthesiologists will give you a patented combination of drugs to medically induce a coma. Then all you do is sleep while around-the-clock nurses tend to your every need. Depending on your goal weight, doctors will calibrate the medicine to keep you sleeping away the inches!
Never again will you have to say no to dessert or pass on seconds. No more leafy salads or nonfried foods.* No more going to bed hungry or debating whether eating ice cream in the middle of the night is okay. Sleepaway™ will virtually teleport you to the new you! It will be as if you blinked and lost all the weight you wanted.
Of course, there are side effects, like muscle deterioration and permanent coma, but that only affects a few** patients. Not muscle deterioration, though, that is unavoidable but easily fixed with a few months of therapy and steroids to zip you along. Really, the rewards far outweigh the risks. Obesity is the number one cause of death in America, behind smoking and three types of cancer.
Do it for your health.
Call now and receive one week of weight-shredding coma for free!
*So long as you use Sleepaway™ to periodically and painlessly reverse the gain.
**For people trying to lose more than 40 pounds per coma, the risk of staying in a permanent vegetative state increases by 50%.